Vicki Marie’s Sexy Summer Reading Series: One Chapter A Day
THE BACHELOR CHAPTERS: A THINKING WOMAN’S ROMANCE
After seven days, and no word from Andre, I swallowed my pride, and took a detour past his house. The city had been slammed with a record snowfall that Monday night, shutting down power citywide, and the roads had been treacherous. The temperature remained low, leaving ice and snow and abandoned cars to linger on the steep Seattle slopes, making many roads impassable. I had lost power at my place for five full days, and there were still pockets in the city that were suffering. Andre hadn’t called the day after the game, as promised, or the following day. On day three after the storm, I left him a message asking him if he was OK, but didn’t hear a word.
My stomach twisted as I turned onto his street and saw his BMW in the driveway. Not only was his car there, but the driveway and the sidewalk had been shoveled and were bone dry. He had made it home safely the night of the storm, and had been taking care of his business. Meanwhile, without power, I had been couch surfing, and trying to make sense of his silence. Now, it was crystal clear. He was safe. And he was done.
I’ve found that men don’t say good-bye when they’re dating a bachelor. They don’t inform you if they’ve changed their minds, or if their pride has been wounded, or if their activities simply migrate in a direction that doesn’t include you. Without a conventional commitment, there’s no social imperative. There’s not even kindness. It’s a gray area, and I told myself that it wasn’t personal; it was just life—when a man wants to move on, he’s entitled to do so. He was my past, I lived in the present, and so I was obligated to accept it. I had too much pride to complain: and too much wisdom to seek out the reasons why.
For a minute, with Andre, I was touched by that inexplicable exchange of energy my culture calls love. It was unexpected, and it was a deep, tender pleasure. I don’t know why he withdrew. By now, I’d come to believe that the reasons have little value. Toni had taught me that. In the end, explanations don’t change outcome, nor do they minimize the grief. A breakup, like death, is a loss. It simply sucks.
TOMORROW: Chapter 62
Copyright Vicki Marie Stolsen, 2014, Forever Forty-Four Publications, Publicity Rare Bird Lit, Tyson Cornell, Tyson@rarebirdlit.com, Distribution by Ingram, Available online and in bookstores in paperback, eBook, and audio format.